Best of Mixerr Album Reviews! Page 405

Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer - Flattery Not Included album review

Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer - Flattery Not Included is a humourous Chap Hop album with comedy, jazz, electro swing, and rap where comedy rap, jazz rap, and electro swing meet each other. You have refined and sophisticated lyrics along with advanced topics. His songwriting is quite lengthy and extensive. His songs have some exquisite lengthy songwriting skills.

There are highbrow parody songs on the album such as Straight out of Surrey (Straight Outta Surrey) and Let Me Smoke My Pipe. Those are the highlight parody songs of the album.

His debut album was an idealised version of Edwardian life during the Edwardian period of British history during the reign of King Edward VII which lasted from 1901 to 1910. As a proper “Gentleman Rhymer” Mr.B raps and conducts himself in a dignified, modest manner throughout the entire album of course. He uses the most prestigious form of spoken British English known as Received Pronunciation on all his songs. His accent gives his album a dignified intellectual edge.


Sherry Monocle is a posh intellectual Chap Hop based rap song about Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer being attracted to a woman while drunk off a type of strong wine called Sherry. His antiquated classy Sherry monocle is a refined adaptation of beer goggles.

Mr.B met her at the Jubilee Perfumery. There was a rumour Mr.B and her were indulging in some rudery scandalous behaviour. It was true you see. Although it prudently eluded Mr.B. Mr.B is a student of the University of Verse as-well as fert and free speech. And weeks had gone by.

Well that's not strictly true. She said, “bye”. And then she left him. Bereft of hope that someday he might make her his own. Or take her to Rome or at least bake her some scones. But she left him alone with nothing but his rhymes. And his palms and his numerous balms. But she abstained from Mr.B’s charms when he opened his arms. He duly attempted a pass but she left him in the khazi on his arse. Mr.B was vastly unaware of her intentions as she was hiding something in her unmentionables. Mr.B though she really was a tease. But she had a venereal disease! Mr.B’s advances may have doubled his chances of contracting her venereal disease.

Mr.B rather likes the idea of her pleasing him. But he doesn't want to go out like Eazy-E. She handed Mr.B her number and said, "If you want to call." But Mr.B is afraid he rather had on his Sherry monocle. And when he awoke, he was heartened to note he was at her place. He couldn't finish his porridge if he had to look at her face over the breakfast table in confusion over the events that occurred which he didn’t remember due to his state of drunkenness.

So the conclusion Mr.B had succumbed to was make a bloody run for it. So he bolted to the door. But the woman jolted him to the floor in a rage. Mr.B tells her he is engaged to someone. Mr.B said, "I'm sorry old girl but I'm engaged." This was perhaps not the best course of action for him to take. She grabbed a hold of his arm and said, "Stay or it'll break!" She let him up and made some allusions to love. But she had hands like bally wicket-keepers gloves. He gave her her reason to call him a ruddy pest. But when he went downstairs, it was a bloody awful mess! That is how and why he revolted.

He thought this woman was a Hottentot. But she had a rather rotten bot! Mr.B uses the term “Hottentot” to mean the chap equivalent of a “big booty hoe.” He thought he wanted her to call. But he was sporting his antiquated classy Sherry monocle. She had no need to call Mr.B a pest. But when he went downstairs, it was a bloody awful mess!


Mr.B gives everyone a piece of his mind in a gentlemanly manner with his song A Piece Of My Mind. He gripes in a dignified, modest manner about the lack of manners from people in society to usage of bad grammar which bother him.

The misuse of apostrophes is preposterous to him. The misuse of apostrophes offends his very soul from his brogues to his bowler hat. It’s a whole lot of guff. It makes him want to take someone roughly by the lapels of their blazer and haze them.

It also eludes Mr.B how people can be so unruly. He truly despises rudesbys. So you'd better bust a move or you'll be trussed up to within an inch of your life. And Mr.B will say to the doorman, “I’m going back inside to give him a piece of my mind.” It's your folly you know. You should never have tried to get inside in those clothes. They're an abomination to such an establishment. This could only condone your banishment.


Straight out of Surrey (Straight Outta Surrey) is the posh Chap Hop and comedy rap parody of N.W.A. - Straight Outta Compton with Chap Hop and electro swing elements. This is one of Mr.B’s more highbrow parody songs.

The original song begins with the opening line “You are now about to witness the strength of street knowledge”. Mr.B is parodies this intro with his comparative cricket knowledge and Chap Hop knowledge. That line is replaced with “You are now about to witness the extent of cricket knowledge” Mr.B’s cricket knowledge.

Straight out of Surrey is a gentleman rhymer named Mr.B. He is friendly with chaps with an air of mystery. Had he been poised to be sad, he would have got some more shag. Squeeze it out the pipe and declare it is a voice brag. It'd be super if you dined with him. The constabulary pop in for a swift tea. He doffs his hat at a passer when he is going out in public. Because Mr.B is a proper chap, his mustache is required to be constantly trimmed and waxed. So he uses a hair dye solution called Grecian 2000.

Please don't grumble. Try to act humble. You embarrass yourself when you bumble going on about your mother like that with a hat that's jaunty angled. Mr.B says that a proper “Gentleman Rhymer” should conduct himself in a dignified, modest manner.

The shag is so smooth. Mr.B’s got a chair by the fire so he shan't move. Talk of murder is so tawdry. Mr.B has a crime record like Charles Hawtrey. A good Duncan Fearnley is the tool. My dear boy, you bowl like a fool at cricket. He’ll take you to The Oval maybe. Mr.B. is such an avid cricket fan that he has his own personal box seat there. On hand to observe Mike Brearley.

And when Mr.B is with the bat, he is batting straight out for Surrey. He’ll keep bowling his arm straight as he will never chuck. You'll be out third ball in a hurry. But you don't dare chuck at him. For when he is at the crease it'll be a duck. He attacks the ball with vigor with the strength and force he hits with.  His score gets bigger and you know this. He’s knocked it on the scoreboard to show this. Mr.B really doesn't mind if you don't rate these chaps. For their country, they've got a hundred caps. He’ll send you packing with a legal straight arm. He’ll whack another boundary in a minute. Mr.B goes to find a gap in the outfield to go and fill it. So if you're on a deck chair in the front row, you best watch yourself. You might get rather miffed. Which of course you're entitled to.

Mr.B will stroll over there in his whites and frighten you. But when a jolly Hottentot from the seats throws the ball back in bits, he will charm her with wits and with her blouse signed. She'll leave ecstatic. Mr.B is so charismatic! The definition is clear. You're the witness of a grilling. That's taking place before a gruel. You may give MR.B a little lip. But a sledger like you gets hit down the bowling strip like Dennis Compton.


Let Me Smoke My Pipe is Mr.B’s dignified, modest cover of DJ Kool - Let Me Clear My Throat.

Mr.B likes to smoke his pipe with a cup of tea that is Lapsang Suchong and devilled kidneys. His pipe smells nice. Why would anybody want to stop him? Mr.B is a man of taste and finesse. But he must get something off his chest. He’ll abide by the laws of your watering holes. But he won’t stand in the rain with a pack of ruddy proles puffing on their Marlboros or Mayfair Lights. Or worse, those herbal trade fair types.

If he was in the club with a broadsheet waiting for a pinky rub on his bored feet, he would watch them from the window in their sportswear shoes. Now he’s got to go out and be bored there too. So Prime Minister Sir, this just won’t do. The smoke’s all gone, but now the pubs smell of wee. Won’t you come and smoke a pipe with Mr.B?


More Kissing in Porn Please, We’re British explains that Mr.B likes pornographic content that involves kissing. The song uses a warped ragtime piano over a jazz standard and amorous themes. Why can't there be more kissing in porn? Where has all the romance gone?

Mr.B is a man of the simplest of pleasures. He’ll read an erotic pamphlet of his leisure. But never with anything else on his mind. Then making the most of the passing of time. Mr.B is a romantic at heart as you know. But he’s also starting to grow. So he’ll delve slightly deeper inside until he finds something that turns his insides on. It seems the tide has turned when all of his dreams on amorous themes. Holding hands have been dashed long before the bishop's been bashed. The cash to be made from depravity, illicit, and filling bodily cavities in darkened lavatories have replaced the seductive arts. Why can't there be more kissing in porn? Where has all the romance gone?

Mr.B like to think his doctrine is methodical. His theory is simple enough. A little more kissing. A little less muff is the start of a gentleman's night timely dreams and not the extremes that are brought on these screams. He doesn't want to see one single more rerun of some rotter chuffing in some filly's face. He has flipped through pages of the Anamata periodical. "Good lord! That thing is the size of a tree trunk!"

And from where this gentleman rhymes, there's no sense of whimsy. Their plots are so flimsy And 10 seconds in it's just wall to wall mimsy. Why can't there be more kissing in porn? All he can see is pissing and scorn. Where has all the romance gone? That's why Mr.B likes kissing in porn.

5/5*****!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer - O.G. Original Gentleman album review

Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer - O.G. Original Gentleman is a dignified compilation of Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer’s Chap Hop songs from his other albums. Any Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer completionist must have this album to complete their collection. The album uses electro swing elements over rap lyrics. You have refined and sophisticated lyrics along with advanced topics.


Sherry Monocle is a posh intellectual Chap Hop based rap song about Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer being attracted to a woman while drunk off a type of strong wine called Sherry. His antiquated classy Sherry monocle is a refined adaptation of beer goggles.

Mr.B met her at the Jubilee Perfumery. There was a rumour Mr.B and her were indulging in some rudery scandalous behaviour. It was true you see. Although it prudently eluded Mr.B. Mr.B is a student of the University of Verse as-well as fert and free speech. And weeks had gone by.

Well that's not strictly true. She said “bye” and then she left him. Bereft of hope that someday he might make her his own. Or take her to Rome or at least bake her some scones. But she left him alone with nothing but his rhymes. And his palms and his numerous balms. But she abstained from Mr.B’s charms when he opened his arms. He duly attempted a pass but she left him in the khazi on his arse. Mr.B was vastly unaware of her intentions as she was hiding something in her unmentionables. Mr.B though she really was a tease. But she had a venereal disease! Mr.B’s advances may have doubled his chances of contracting her venereal disease.

Mr.B rather likes the idea of her pleasing him. But he doesn't want to go out like Eazy-E. She handed Mr.B her number and said, "If you want to call." But Mr.B is afraid he rather had on his Sherry monocle. And when he awoke, he was heartened to note he was at her place. He couldn't finish his porridge if he had to look at her face over the breakfast table in confusion over the events that occurred which he didn’t remember due to his state of drunkenness.

So the conclusion Mr.B had succumbed to was make a bloody run for it. So he bolted to the door. But the woman jolted him to the floor in a rage. Mr.B tells her he is engaged to someone. Mr.B said, "I'm sorry old girl but I'm engaged." This was perhaps not the best course of action for him to take. She grabbed a hold of his arm and said, "Stay or it'll break!" She let him up and made some allusions to love. But she had hands like bally wicket-keepers gloves. He gave her her reason to call him a ruddy pest. But when he went downstairs, it was a bloody awful mess! That is how and why he revolted.

He thought this woman was a Hottentot. But she had a rather rotten bot! Mr.B uses the term “Hottentot” to mean the chap equivalent of a “big booty hoe.” He thought he wanted her to call. But he was sporting his antiquated classy Sherry monocle. She had no need to call Mr.B a pest. But when he went downstairs, it was a bloody awful mess!


Hail the Chap is a fine posh and exquisite example of Chap Hop You have refined and sophisticated lyrics along with advanced topics. Hail the Chap is backed by a vintage jazz sample and horn under a ukulele with electro swing elements over rap lyrics.

Mr.B vented about his disgust about millennials and how they’ve ruined society on Hail the Chap. When the millennial generation’s problems and feelings of unhappiness were approaching from the 21st century, Mr.B’s problems mostly consisting of things that he would consider improper such as hoes and aggressive rude brash men, He assumed a permanent fix to these problems by clashing them with his gentlemanly style. Before these millennials made boredom a normal state of being Mr.B and a few of his colleges fostered a movement of change to stop this from becoming the norm. As was the case in his song Modern Chaps.

The good old days of ancient Greece’s long standing art, history, and culture that has shaped much of Western society has been weakened and ruined by arrogant unambitious fools.

Although Mr.B’s whole schtick is his affectation for the Victorian era, the power-dynamic of a strictly passive male gaze is simply unacceptable in contemporary social morals. Not surprising considering the Victorian era was an era known for its emotional and sexual restraint. Conservatism was at an all time high during the Victorian era. Therefore under the contemporary rules of etiquette to be a “Chap”, it is necessary to acknowledge those you pass on the street with a doff of a hat (top your hat) and perhaps conversation. They are people, after all.

At the approach of the millennial malaise, there were blights with a need of a perennial braze. The age of the Corinthian, the plunderer, and the dandy had given way to that of the prig and the bore. Just before boredom became a modus operandi. Society is floundering in squalid desperation. And what's wanted to save it was a savvy publication.

Now Mr.B has often wondered how best to dress for wrestling. Between ties and cravats, which was the best thing? Were there really 73 ways to doff one's hat? There were!  You can stay in standard evolution. Mr.B and a few of his colleges fostered a movement of change to stop boredom from becoming the norm. Or come and join Mr.B and his colleges in their dandy revolution. Give your pipe a tap. Park your rattle trap. Raise your hat or cap. As we say, all hail The Chap!

Now we all know rules are there to be broken. But never have truer words been spoken than in the code hereafter. They’ve upped they standards. So up yours too! It's a call to charms. A design for living within a world so unforgiving where sloth and banality are the standard brew. Hear and read the 10 rules of The Chap manifesto.

    1.    Thou shalt always wear tweed is the only fabric you shall ever need.
    2.    Thou shalt never not smoke with pipes made from briar or booze aged in oak.
    3.    Always be courteous to the ladies.
    4.    Never ever wear denim pantaloons.
    5.    Thou shalt always doff one's hat if you're flaneur or simply like to stop and chat.
    6.    Never fasten the lower button of one's weskit.
    7.    Don't give the Westwoods a monopoly.
    8.    Never wear plimsolls if not doing sport unless you're a Chap Hop superstar sort.
    9.    Always worship the trouser press.
    10.    Always cultivate interesting facial hair. But on the top. Not under there. Mustaches and well-groomed beards are always appreciated, but neckbeards are a social no-no.


You Just Can’t explained the things you can’t do certain things in today’s modern society and on social media network websites like Facebook anymore. The song showcase how societal standards have changed during the digital age of information.  

As we slide down the razor blade of life these days, in many ways the malaise of modern life betrays the many wonders that abound and in equal ways confound. There's so much a chap can do that needn't cost a pound. One can natter to a flapper down under. As a matter of course until one is hoarse. Or call any resource. One can fly off to the colonies for gentlemanly bonhomie in cheerful friendliness.

But if the colonials bother Mr.B, he can order up a bombing spree and theatrical productions at the mere push of a button. Or simply move your house if you don't want to live in Sutton.
These days one can do just what one pleases such as buy exotic cheeses and catch exotic diseases.
They can buy enough pornography on tap to fairly kill a chap.

But do take heed because it all could be a trap. Mr.B can tell by the gormless grin on your face that you think the modern world is a wonderful. However “most of us” know that is not all true thanks to global warming, political correctness, war, and racism.

But you just can't rape a goat these days it'll end up on your Facebook page thanks to advances in technology. If the public notices what you did to that goat, you'll have the authorities at your throat. You'll be in trouble in so many ways. You just can't confuse a billy or a nanny for a willy or a fanny because you'll have the local papers in a rage.

These days dirty little secrets never last now that privacy is a thing of the past. The merest misdemeanour can be seen upon a screen here people know what you have done and they know where you have been. A fart or a log will be part of a blog. Before your hands are washed and you emerge from the fog the cogs of the machine force one to keep it clean. Watch your step when you strap on the naughty trampoline. Freedom of speech is not freedom of expression. When the line's been breached you should learn a lesson. When the farmer come with his big shotgun, then run. Now that privacy's gone you'd better keep your schlong inside the members of the human race.

These lyrics explained how much of a nanny state the United Kingdom has become and how privacy is now a thing of the past in most ways. These lyrics also explain to people that freedom of speech is not freedom of expression and that freedom of speech is not freedom from consequences.

These days dirty little secrets never last
Now that privacy is a thing of the past
The merest misdemeanour can be seen upon a screen
Where people know what you have done
And they know where you have been
A fart or a log will be part of a blog
Before your hands are washed and you emerge from the fog
The cogs of the machine force one to keep it clean
(Watch your step when you strap on the naughty trampoline)
Freedom of speech is not freedom of expression
When the line's been breached you should learn a lesson
When the farmer come with his big shotgun then run
Now that privacy's gone you'd better keep your schlong
Inside the members of the human race


More Kissing in Porn Please, We’re British explains that Mr.B likes pornographic content that involves kissing. The song uses a warped ragtime piano over a jazz standard and amorous themes. Why can't there be more kissing in porn? Where has all the romance gone?

Mr.B is a man of the simplest of pleasures. He’ll read an erotic pamphlet of his leisure. But never with anything else on his mind. Then making the most of the passing of time. Mr.B is a romantic at heart as you know. But he’s also starting to grow. So he’ll delve slightly deeper inside until he finds something that turns his insides on. It seems the tide has turned when all of his dreams on amorous themes. Holding hands have been dashed long before the bishop's been bashed. The cash to be made from depravity, illicit, and filling bodily cavities in darkened lavatories have replaced the seductive arts. Why can't there be more kissing in porn? Where has all the romance gone?

Mr.B like to think his doctrine is methodical. His theory is simple enough. A little more kissing. A little less muff is the start of a gentleman's night timely dreams and not the extremes that are brought on these screams. He doesn't want to see one single more rerun of some rotter chuffing in some filly's face. He has flipped through pages of the Anamata periodical. "Good lord! That thing is the size of a tree trunk!"

And from where this gentleman rhymes, there's no sense of whimsy. Their plots are so flimsy And 10 seconds in it's just wall to wall mimsy. Why can't there be more kissing in porn? All he can see is pissing and scorn. Where has all the romance gone? That's why Mr.B likes kissing in porn.


Guy Debord is the philosophical song on the album which discusses philosophy. Mr.B was inspired by the philosophy of Guy Debord when he wrote this song. Take a train now with Mr.B to the land of 20th century philosophers. Bon, alors Maintenant.

The song begins with a conversation between Guy Debord and Mr.B talking about discussing names. There are a bunch of ambiguous names puns thrown throughout their conversation. When Guy Debord and Mr.B were bored He said to Mr.B, "It's not Guy, it's Guy" "It's Guy not Guy", said Mr.B. "That's right", said Guy Debord who was not Guy but Guy. "I see", said Mr.B to Guy not Guy.

"I see not why you mystify to keep your numbers low not highs. No way to revolutionise and change everyday life."
Mr.B asked his friend called Guy not Guy. "To make you see I have no time. Talk to my friend Raoul Vaneigem. You get it wrong quite every time.", said Mr.B, said to Guy.  "Do try to tell me why you fry. My mind with jargon. It’s so French." "It's Guy." Guy said all rather tense. "Sod you", Mr.B said and thence went off to find a serving wench.

A G&T was off to Mr.B while guys would spout philosophies to other guys. Their theories are absurdities. Escape these dull adversaries are such a bore although they're drunk. I'm amazed that they invented punk.

When Guy Debord and Mr.B were bored, Guy said to Mr.B, "It's not Guy, but Guy. And anyway, boredom's never ever revolutionary." They have a world of pleasure to win and nothing to lose but boredom. Ne travaillez, ne travaillez, ne travaillez, jamais!


Hermitage Shanks is a horn driven jazz rap song with a posh touch of Chap Hop. The song describes how Mr.B is a hermit who needs a place to be alone. Hermitage Shanks is a combination of Armitage Shanks. This is toilet humour in an intellectual manner from a British gentleman.

Mr.B is the chappy who's seen the bappies of a thousand lappy lasses clad in all the castle. But probably not the hassle. His kazound's up in the wind of a world of pure delight. Bright the world of sin is. Like the finish on some nylon tights. Styled on times gone past with just a hint of 21st century arse (ass). Mr.B is the chap who spent a whole damn summer on gin. He got the clap and lamented.

He wants to run to the place where he find space, solace, comfort and grace. Far from the trappings of the rodentile race. If the lure of modern life has become too much, he longs for his porcelain crutch and so. Mr.B will brace himself for whatever may occur. It's the sit-down of champions. I'm sure you'll concur. He will retire to Hermitage Shanks for a rest and a read. Hermitage Shanks is his piece of the rock.  Down with the britches. Out with the old. He clasps the chain with a couple of yanks and give thanks to Hermitage Shanks. He can retire to this room and resume the job at hand. Then he can rejoin his merry band. All he needs is just 10 minutes to recover from the shock and ballyhoo.


The song Lady C discussed how a woman named Lady C won Mr.B over with her use of her womanly charms under less duress and no pain. Lady C is a 1920s style jazz rap song with influences of old timey 1930s ragtime jazz used.

When they first met, Mr. B was planning a career in bounding. He liked the way that was sounding. Gadding it about with numerous girls without so much as a care in the world. But a brief introduction from a dear old chum kicked that theory right up the old bum. And when it got to about date 9 or 10, the time came when Mr.B had to think again. and revise his plans for the life of a cad. I’m afraid he’s got it rather bad.

This woman named Lady C won Mr.B over with her womanly charms and now he holds her in his arms as they watch UK Street Crime on Bravo +1, Then they go off to bed when the washings done. After that, they eat breakfast in the morning as they watch the sea beat the Brackstock Road.

He likes the way Lady C cooks and cleans. And helps him with his gangster lean. Lady C is awfully good at striking poses. And even her fumosities smell of roses! Lady C makes Mr.B smile like no one can. Lady C makes Mr.B a better man. So Mr.B must say thanks again to Lady C for stopping him from becoming a massive wank stain!

4/5****!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lil Mo - 4Ever/Ten Commandments single review

The Lil Mo - 4Ever/Ten Commandments is one of Lil Mo’s best singles of 2003 which was played constantly on the radio and TV. This was one of Lil Mo’s moderately successful singles that got airplay on MTV and BET. Her single has that vibrant urban edge.


It's obvious from that Lil Mo is happy with her new marriage and her firstborn child. She states she's really to settle down and have some kids on the song 4ever. She's ready to live life. It's ride or die and do or die for Lil Mo! She's ready to get married and be in a marriage.

Lil Mo and Fabulous make a great duo! Fabulous raps and Lil Mo sings resulting in a perfect combination. That's why whenever they both collaborate, their songs turnout to be a success with fans alike. This isn't the first time Fabulous and Lil Mo have collaborated. Check out songs such as Superwoman, Sumtimes I, and Can't Let You Go!

Lil Mo is at the point in her life where she is tired of playing games. She is ready to settle down, to buy a house, change her last name and have some kids. She is ready for the life to live and all love has to give.

Lil Mo shows maturity in this song. She went from being Superwoman to a wife. These lyrics highlight her maturity as a woman: “Ready for the life to live/And all love has to give/I been your superwoman for so long/Ready to be your wife”

Now that love's taken over, she is 100% sure that it's here to stay. There are no issues standing in her way. Both of them aren’t going anywhere. Let's make it official. Together for always. Marriage will be crazy, baby. Can you live with it? To have and hold forever. Baby ride or die till death do us part. Let's make love last forever. Let's make it last forever.


Lil Mo’s Ten Commandments was a cover of Notorious BIG - Ten Crack Commandments. However this version of Ten Commandments is for the ladies. Lil Kim’s raps gives the song a flavor of East Coast rap and raunchy sex rap. Lil Mo wrote herself a manual on how to keep your man. Those are her 10 commandments.

Lil Mo is loved by millions.People know her name. They recognize her face. Some nights she never gets to sleep because there are so many people to please. You gotta understand these 10 commandments.

5/5*****!!